I've been in this industry for 25 years. I'm more aware than ever of how good people become part of bad machines; how ethical concerns get clobbered by engineering deadlines.
Facebook *is* that bad, and it will get worse.
We can't stop it by ourselves, not properly.
But it doesn't mean we have to go along with it.
If you've read this far, then talk to me. I don't have a solid single answer, but we can make things better. I'd say "we have the technology" but that's the easy part.