Especially long hair -- my hair nearly reaches my ass. That doesn't just HAPPEN to not be visible. It takes intent and effort to keep it up and out of sight.
Maybe (like me) it's religious/cultural tradition, maybe it's something else, whatever. But love of whatever your consider sacred, DON'T make a big deal of it when someone like me has their hair visible.
It's like commenting on a person not wearing a bra -- extremely personal and probably embarrasing.
(Boosts welcome on this)
Another layer to this -- if you can see my hair and you aren't family -- that means something BAD. Either there is crisis/urgent situation/thing bad enough that I feel I don't have time to put my hair up before going out or my health is bad enough I wasn't able to.
So making a big deal about how nice it is to see my hair when the only reason you can see my hair at all is I'm trying to cope with some kind of problem?
If you aren't sure what is going on/if it is okay to say something, NEUTRAL comment.
My neighbor could have just said, 'oh, I don't think I've seen your hair before.'
Then I could have said, 'yeah, I was worried about the water and didn't take time to put it up. Kind of embarrassing but what can you do?'
And then he'd have known that I considered going out with my hair down inappropriate and we'd both have been spared a lot of discomfort.
Also -- DON'T try to touch people's hair.
@jessmahler this sounds excruciating 😫💜
@mood It really was. Completely fucked up my morning. I'm about to see if I can make something of my afternoon... wish me luck!
@jessmahler good luck!!!
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