Okay folks, I've been asked a question about managing needs and expectations in #polyamory. For future reference, as long as I have spoons and time I am always happy to answer questions for polyam folks trying to figure stuff out.
This will probably be a long thread, so hiding the rst behind a CW. Feel free to read along and share your experience/insights.
If you are new to the Fediverse and want to follow me, PLEASE at least have *something* in your profile and an #introductions post.
We were all new once, I get it. But I'm not going to accept follow requests from folks with blank profiles and no toots.
Give me some way to learn about who you are.
Look, if I get to the last book of your trilogy (or more than 3/4s of the way through your stand-alone novel) and your main characters who are *supposed* to be partners are still sneaking around and lying to each other, you better *hope* I don't leave a review because my main take away is going to be that you wasted my time reading about characters who didn't learn fuck-all during the course of the story.
Tradition is The Support Frame — Generational Home
Last week I spent a while talking about how economic stability is the foundation of a family, and for a family that will hold together through the generations, this usually means a family business to provide that stability.
The caveat, that I didn't mention last week is that this assumes the family business is successful. Obviously, and unsuccessful fami
Okay okay I have no idea why I ever doubted that I had ADHD (that's not true I 100% know why I doubted it) but holy shit these comics.
I was enjoying this series until we got to the first combat scene.
While the hell would experienced knights hunt a boar with swords?
While the hell would experienced knights hunt a *magic* *oversized* *intelligent* boar with swords?
Their called boar spears for a god-damn reason!
*grumble grumble grumble*
Got the marigolds repotted. Waited to long as one of them was badly rootbound, and the others starting to get that way. Aside from that, everything went well.
Unfortunately, for some reason I can't just put the new pots in a bucket of water and have them absorb water and water them that way. Not sure why, but I *think* the way the bottom of the pot is shaped is trapping air and keeping water from reaching the drain holes.
If you center Black Jews and Jews of Color in your thinking about Judaism/Jewishness, you can begin to piece together how anti-Judaism and antisemitism led to the creation of White Supremacy, but more importantly, you can begin to piece together an overarching theory of Diasporic studies that includes Jewish history AND the African Diaspora, you see the falseness of distinctions between peoples, which is to say the falseness of borders, and the richness of points of contact.
Never (but never) use WD-40 or 3-in-1 oil as a lubricant on anything. These are not lubricants. These are water displacement oils. They're meant to prevent rust and they're really good at doing that but party of why they're really good at that is that they thicken when exposed to air.
Don't want your lubricant getting all gummy? Good. Don't use water displacement oils as lubricants even if they do help momentarily.
Gonna try repotting my marigolds today. First time repotting /anything/, so fingers crossed.
What are your plans for the day?
@jessmahler I googled this subject a month ago when I had to make a phonecall, and they say it's related to body language. This didn't make sense to me at first, I don't understand most body language, but then I realised, I'm also sending. In real life people pick up on it if I need more time to process, in phonecalls, they don't.
A thought: A voice on the phone is impersonal and faceless. A voice is easier to misread, easier to deny. A person in front of a person is a stronger, instant connection, even if it's adversarial.
Made phone call to pay bill. Got panic attack.
Why is it actually easier to physically go down to the office to pay the bill than use the phone?
I wonder if there's a level of... dysphoria or dissociation or... I don't know the word. But like it fucks with my head to have what I'm hearing not align with what I'm seeing?
Is that a thing?
Except I love talking on the phone w/ friends and family. It's only non-social phone calls I have trouble with.
I've been struggling for a while with how I'm going to observe Sukkot. The apartment complex we live in will NOT let me build a sukkah, and given current situation I don't think I can make it to/handle the celebration/sukkah raising my synagogue does.
I think what I'm going to try to do is eat at least one meal a day outside. Start with dinner on the erev and then lunch during the day. If I can manage one, it's a win, if I can manage both, even better.
Going through an identity crisis, so god knows what this bio will say next week.
The Wandering Shop is a Mastodon instance initially geared for the science fiction and fantasy community but open to anyone. We want our 'local' timeline to have the feel of a coffee shop at a good convention: tables full of friendly conversation on a wide variety of topics. We welcome everyone who wants to participate, so long as you're willing to abide by our code of conduct.